


Legally Bluffing

by starspangledlibra



Category: Legally Blonde (2001), 逆転裁判 | Gyakuten Saiban | Ace Attorney
Genre: AU, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Law School AU, Legally Blonde inspired, M/M, somewhat of a crossover
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-03
Updated: 2015-07-29
Packaged: 2018-04-11 22:58:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4455755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starspangledlibra/pseuds/starspangledlibra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After being rejected and humiliated by the girl he thought was the love of his life, Phoenix comes up with a plan to win her back.  The plan?  To become a man that she and her parents can be proud of- to become a lawyer.  But law school turns out to be a lot tougher than he thought, and things get even more complicated when he runs into someone who he thought he'd lost forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Legally Bluffing

The young man in the blue suit reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box.  Knowing that the table concealed his actions, he placed the box on his lap, and for a moment, he just held it there, running his hands over the soft black velvet. A brief flash of doubt invaded his thoughts, but he quickly shrugged it off.  He had been planning this night for months, taking time in carefully selecting the perfect ring, working extra shifts at the campus coffee shop to pay for said ring, and then, reserving a table at this very restaurant, on this very night.  Because today was their anniversary, and this restaurant was where they’d had their first date. Now, this was her favorite restaurant, and they were drinking her favorite champagne, and she was smiling at him in the way that always made his heart flutter… Yes, he was ready. This night had been a long time coming, and now the moment was finally here.  He could do this. 

Phoenix stood up, walked over to his date’s side of the table, and got down on one knee.  He looked up at her with wide, hopeful eyes as he began the little speech he’d prepared.  

“Dollie,” he began.  “These past two years have been amazing, and the memories we’ve created during them are something that I’ll treasure forever. But… Graduation is in a few months, and I don’t want what we have to end after we’re out of school. Because what we have is special, and I know that you are the person I’m meant to spend the rest of my life with. So, Dahlia Hawthorne… Would you do me the honor of marrying me?”  He opened the box and held out the ring- a stunning pink diamond, set in a thin, white gold band.  And, it wasn’t visible right then, but he had also had the date of their anniversary engraved on the inside.

He waited with bated breath for Dahlia’s reply. He assumed that she was taking in the sight of the beautiful ring, and that’s why she wasn’t saying anything, but as the seconds of silence dragged on, he began to get a little discouraged. He felt himself getting red in the face; he could see diners at the surrounding tables were watching to see what would happen.  What did this exchange look like from their point of view?  Was he blowing it?  Had he said something wrong? Or was he moving things too fast? Was she overwhelmed because he had proposed in public?  He was about to apologize and tell her to take her time with her answer, when she finally spoke.

“Oh, Feenie, that ring is beautiful… Wow… I don’t know what to say… Actually, I- I guess I do… No.”

“Oh, this is great!  I promise, Dollie, I’m gonna make you so happy- just as happy as you’ve made me, and I… Wait, what?  What did you say?”

“I said no.”

With those three words, Phoenix’s heart crumbled. He closed the box and sank down even lower to the ground, so that he was sitting on the restaurant floor. More people were staring at him now, most with pity in their eyes, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “But- but- why not? I thought things were going well between us… Did I do something wrong?  Is it too soon for you?  Because I can wait. I’ll wait as long it takes until you’re ready, Dollie, I swear, I-”

“It’s not that.  It’s not because it’s too soon.”

“Then… why would you-” He broke off to swallow the lump in his throat.  This whole experience was humiliating enough without him crying in the middle of a crowded restaurant.  He needed to try to hold it together.  At least until he got home.

“Oh, Feenie…” Phoenix felt her lay a gentle hand on his head, then quickly pull away.  “We’ve had fun these past two years.  A lot of fun, but… you’re right.  Graduation is right around the corner- it’s the ceremony that marks the beginning of the rest of our lives.  We need to start thinking about our futures.  And, well… since I plan on becoming a writer, I need someone who can support me until I get my first novel published.” 

“I can do that!  And you know that I’d support anything you wanted to, no matter what it is.” 

Dahlia smiled and shook her head. “I know, Feenie, but come on… be serious.  You’re an art student. A painting major. Who knows when you’ll be able to get a real job with that degree, let alone one that pays well… Besides, my parents are expecting a lot from me, and that includes my choice of groom.”

“Wait!  But I thought your parents liked me!  We spent Christmas at their house, and your mom and dad were so nice. We baked cookies together!  Was that all an act?!”

“No, Feenie, of course not!  They liked you!  Just, you know, as a boyfriend.  A college boyfriend. They wouldn’t ever approve of you becoming my husband someday though!  In fact… well, this kind of awkward, but… my mother has already started looking for potential marriage candidates for me.  I’m supposed to meet one sometime next week.”

“M-marriage candidates?”

“Yeah… Men that are marriage material, you know? Men with respectable careers like doctors and lawyers… Oh, Feenie, I’m sorry.  I guess I should have told you sooner, but I thought you already knew how this was going to turn out.”

“And, I thought you loved me,” he said, his voice cracking at the end.  “But I guess we both thought wrong.” 

“Feenie…”

“Don’t-Don’t call me that!” he shouted. He stood up and shoved the ring box back into his pocket.  “You don’t get to call me that after you break my heart!”  Phoenix knew that he had to get out of there fast; he wasn’t going to be able to hold it in much longer.  His voice was wavering.  His knees were shaking. His eyes were burning, and the lump was rising up in his throat again.  With trembling hands, he reached for his wallet and pulled out the money to pay for their bill.  “I have to go,” he whispered.  “Goodbye, Dahlia.” And with that, he fled the restaurant, ignoring Dahlia’s cries for him to wait.  And once he was outside, he just kept running, though where he was running to, he wasn’t sure yet.  Logically, he should have run to the nearest bus station because he needed a ride home.  Dahlia had driven tonight, and it had apparently started to rain while they were eating. But Phoenix had never been the logical type, and so for awhile, he just ran down the streets aimlessly, panting and crying, and freaking out nearly every stranger he passed along the way.

When he finally came to his senses and stopped running, he found that he was soaking wet, and that he was even further away from home than when he’d started.  And that he had no money left, not even enough for a bus ticket, so he would just have to walk home.  He supposed that he could have just called and asked someone for a ride home; he should have; it was pouring down rain, but he was too miserable to talk to anyone right now, so he gritted his teeth and began the long walk to the dorms.  It took him over an hour to get there, and once inside his room, he stripped down to his boxers and crawled into bed, silently thanking his roommate for not being there as the tears began welling up in his eyes again. 

“Dollie,” he mumbled into his pillow. “Why?”

 

* * *

 

After a breakup, life was supposed to go on. Sure, it was going to be painful at first, dealing with being rejected, and in his case, publicly rejected, but then it was supposed to get better.  He was supposed to be able to pick up the pieces of his shattered heart and move forward.  But six days later, and Phoenix wasn’t moving anywhere, much less forward. He was still in his dorm room, with all the lights turned off, huddled under the blankets. In bed with him was the tv remote, a bag of chips, and large box of tissues. Though the tissues were less for crying at this point, and more for the cold he was trying to recover from. He had caught a nasty one the day after his breakup with Dahlia, probably from all the stress, and from spending a couple hours out in the rain.  He was finally at the point where his roommate wasn’t too disgusted to be around him, but he still wasn’t completely better yet.  And even if he were, he wouldn’t feel like going anywhere anyway. It was better to stay here in this dorm room, where he didn’t have to worry about embarrassing himself again, or having his heart broken by seeing Dahlia.  She was, after all, in two of his classes, and he wasn’t ready to face her yet. He didn’t know if he would ever be ready…

_God, I’m such a loser_ , he thought to himself, as he grabbed yet another tissue. _No wonder Dollie is so ashamed of me…_

A knock on the door interrupted his latest self-pity session, and although he answered with, “Go away!” the door opened anyway, and the unwanted visitors let themselves inside.

“Aww, come on, that’s no way to greet your friends, Nick- especially not your favorite roommate.”

Phoenix rolled his eyes.  “You’re my only roommate, Larry.  And I don’t think you deserve that title after pretty much ditching me this entire week.”

Larry scratched at the back of his neck and chuckled nervously.  “Ahh, yeah, sorry about that, Buddy… Look, I can’t afford to get sick right now, that’s all.  Things are getting serious between Candace and me; we’ve been going out every night this week- dinner, dancing, the movies… I think she might be the one, Nick!” 

Phoenix coughed weakly in reply. “That’s great,” he croaked. “Wait… Candace? What happened to Jennifer?”

“Jennifer? Oh yeah, her… Yeah that didn’t work out- we broke up last Tuesday; I thought I told you, Man…”

“You probably did,” the other intruder interjected, shaking her head.  “But it’s not like we can keep track of ALL your escapades… Not unless we started writing them down... And then we probably still wouldn’t get them all…” She sighed. “How are you feeling, Nick? You look a little better than the last time I saw you.” 

“Fantastic,” he deadpanned.  “Look, guys, I don’t wanna be rude, but I’m not really in the mood for company right now.  I guess technically, I can’t kick Larry out, but… Maya, could you get rid of him for me?”    

“Nick, that’s mean!” Larry whined. “And after Maya and I went to the trouble of making you soup!”  He reached into the bag he’d been holding and pulled out a bowl with a lid on it, and a spoon.

“Actually, I made it,” Maya clarified. “He just sat in the kitchen and watched.”

“Yeah, well, I bought the ingredients for the soup!”

“With the money I gave you.”

“Ok, true, but I went to the store and picked up the ingredients, so that has to count for something, right, Nick?” 

Phoenix groaned, ignoring Larry’s question, and instead turned his attention to Maya. 

“Is it the chicken noodle soup you made last time?”

“Yup.”

“Ok, you guys can stay.”

Five minutes later, and the three of them were all crammed in on Phoenix’s bed, with Phoenix sitting in the middle, holding his bowl of soup, which was already half empty.  Maya was quick to notice this.

“Geeze Nick, I’m glad you like my cooking, but when was the last time you had a proper meal?” 

“Umm… Define proper?”

“Something that’s not junk food, and didn’t come out of a can.  And no, ramen does not count. Frozen pizza doesn’t count either.”

“Well then… six days ago?” 

“You mean, the night when-?”

“The night when Dollie broke up with me?” He stared down into his soup and sighed. “Yeah.” 

“Nick… I’m sorry.  What she did to you was awful; clearly she doesn’t deserve you… But you have to move on.  And you have to start taking better care of yourself.” 

“Yeah, Dude, and you’ve gotta leave this room; it’s been like a week!”

“Or at the very least, take a shower.” She ran a hand through his hair, and then winced.  “Yeah, definitely take a shower because your hair is gross!”  

“Yeah, I know.”  Though instinctively, he reached up to check for himself. He grimaced.  She was right.  This was probably the greasiest his hair had ever been; he had done a better job of keeping clean during finals week last year, and that was saying something. “You’re right, Maya- you too Larry; I do need to move on, it’s just… I don’t know how.  She said such horrible things to me that night, but I’m still in love with her, you know?”  At this comment, Maya slapped him upside the head.  “OW!” He rubbed at the impact site gingerly. “What was that for?”

“For saying you’re still in love with her! Why would you still be in love with that little bi- why would you still be in love with her? I mean, nobody expects you to get back out there, dating wise, for awhile- nobody can bounce back as quickly as Larry here can.  But you have to at least get over Dahlia, for your own sanity… and physical well being,” she added, after watching Phoenix sneeze into a tissue. “You deserve to be happy again, or at least, to not be miserable.” 

Phoenix sighed yet again and put the lid back on his soup.  Then, after setting it down on the floor, he flopped back down onto the bed, sprawling out across Maya and Larry’s laps.  “I know, I know! Look, I get it, ok, but I can’t help how I feel.  And, crazy as it might sound, I still think that Dollie’s the one for me.” 

“No, Nick, she’s not.”

“Yeah, didn’t you say she wants a guy with a real job?”

“Not helping, Larry!”

“Sorry.  But seriously, didn’t you tell me that she wants to marry someone more successful- err, someone with a more umm… profitable career?” 

“Well, yeah, but… the way she was talking that night made it seem like it was her parents who wanted her to marry some rich guy; I don’t think she really cared about that stuff.”

Maya frowned.  “Hmmm… are you sure about that?” 

“Yes!  You guys didn’t know Dollie like I did, and she may look high maintenance, but she’s the sweetest person I ever met.”

“Sickeningly sweet.”

“Shut up, Maya.  Anyway, we dated for two years… I think if she really cared about all that status and wealth stuff, I would have known by now… Yeah… You know, the more I think about it, the more I think that has to be it! Her parents are pressuring her to marry a rich guy, so she had to turn me down… She didn’t want to at all!” 

“Umm, Nick?” 

“I can’t believe I didn’t realize this sooner- Dollie didn’t reject me!” 

“I’m pretty sure she did.”

“No, she didn’t reject me…”  He lifted his head up from Maya’s lap and pulled himself back up into a sitting position.  “In fact… I think she told me exactly what I need to do to win her back!” 

“And what exactly is that?” 

“Become a lawyer!  Or a doctor I guess… But I was never any good at science, especially not biology, so I’d better stick with the lawyer idea.”  

At this, Maya started laughing. “You?  A lawyer?  Ok, just how sick are you?”  She reached over and touched his forehead with the back of her hand.  “Hmm, no fever… Well then, it’s official. You’ve completely lost your mind. Your brain has been broken over one girl in a pretty pink dress.  You need professional help.  Or maybe a slap in the face…” 

“Or a bucket of ice water.” 

“Good idea, Larry; you’re using your brain- that’s rare for you.  I’ll find a bucket. You go to the store and get some ice.” 

“Wait wait wait; stop!” Phoenix cried. “There’s no need for that guys; I’m perfectly sane.  I meant what I said. I’m gonna be a lawyer.” 

“And… you’re serious about that?” 

“I’ve never been more serious about anything in my life!  I’ll have to do some research, but I’m pretty sure you don’t need to be a paralegal major to go to law school, as long as you get a high enough score on that one test- what was it called? The LSATs I think? Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s it! I still have three and a half months till graduation, so until then, I’ll study really hard, ace my LSATs, and in the mean time, I’ll apply to all the law schools I can!  But if I’m going to win Dahlia back, I need to aim for one of the top law schools, like Harvard, or Stanford, or Yale. I need to impress her family, after all. I bet if I got into one of those schools, Dollie would take me back on the spot!  I have to get to the library and start studying!”  He started to get up, but Maya grabbed his wrist and yanked him back down. 

“Whoa, hold on; two things.  First, you need to shower and put on some decent clothes before you go anywhere, and second, you’re talking about some of the best schools in the country, with some of the most competitive admissions rates there are. What makes you think they’ll let you in?”

“Hey, I’m actually pretty smart! I have a 4.0 right now, and as long as I don’t screw anything up between now and May, I’m going to graduate Ivy U. with honors.” 

“Well, that’s a start, but you’re an art major. You don’t know anything about law.”

“Sure I do!  I’ve watched all kinds of late night crime dramas over the years; I’m sure I’ve picked up something.”

Maya groaned and leaned her head back against the wall. “Seriously?  That’s all the experience you have?  You’re doomed.” 

“Well, he also knows a bit from Edgy,” Larry added. “The kid’s father was a defense attorney, and he used to go on and on about some of the cases that he worked. Also about how he wanted to follow in his father’s footsteps someday, I think, but I’m not sure. I kinda tuned him out sometimes, but I’m sure Nick was probably listening, right?” 

At the mention of the name Edgy, Phoenix’s heart dropped down into his stomach.  He hadn’t heard that name in years.  “Uhh, yeah,” he mumbled.  “I guess.”

“Wait, who’s Edgy?” asked Maya, her brow furrowing in confusion.  “And why haven’t I heard about him?” 

“Because he wasn’t that important,” Phoenix said quickly, ignoring a pointed look from Larry.  “He was just a kid I knew in elementary school; we were best friends in fourth grade… But it was a long time ago!  He was only at our school for a couple of years, and then he moved, and I never saw him again.  It’s not like we still keep in contact or anything.”

“Yeah, but he sure did try!  Remember all the letters you used to- oof!” Larry was cut off as Phoenix swiftly elbowed him in the ribs. 

“Like I said, it was a long time ago- it’s not important anymore.  But I do remember that he did know a lot about lawyers and courtrooms and stuff… I think I still remember a little bit from what he told me.” 

“Like what?”

“Evidence is everything.  If you don’t have evidence, you don’t have a case.”

“Well, it’s not much,” said Maya, slowly. “You’re going to have to know a hell of a lot more than that if you want to get into law school… But if you’re dead set on doing this, then we’re with you.  Well, I’m with you, anyway.”

“Hey, I’m with him too!”

“Ok, we’re with you.  I’ll help you study, and Larry can… Larry can go on snack runs, while we study.”

“Sounds good to me!”

“Yeah, it might be a long shot…. Like, a huge long shot, getting you accepted into Harvard, or Stanford, but for you, we’ll do our best.” 

Phoenix smiled, his eyes watering. “You mean that? You’ll help?” 

“Of course.”

“Thank you.” He sniffled.  “Thank you so much!  You guys are the best!”

“Hey, no crying; you’ve done enough of that already!”

“Right- sorry!  I’m just so happy!  This plan is going to work; I can feel it!” 

“Yeah yeah, don’t get too happy until you pass your LSATs.  No, not just pass; if you want to get into a school like Stanford, you’ll need a near perfect score… We have a lot of work to do.”

“Yeah, we really do.  Should we start today?” 

“Hmm… Let’s start tomorrow.  Meet me at the library at nine, and by then, you’d better have washed your hair.”

“You got it… Actually, I think I’m going to take a quick shower now- I feel gross.”

“Yeah, you look gross.  Here, take off that sweater and give it to me.” 

“Why?  What are you going to do with it?  Dollie _made_ this sweater for me, you know!” 

“Oh believe me, I can tell.”

“Ok, so what are you going to do with it? This sweater is important to me.” 

“If I say I’m going to wash it, will you take this thing to law school with you?”

“Of course!”

“Then I’m going to burn it.” 

“What- no!”  He crossed his arms and clung onto the fabric to prevent Maya from ripping it off of him.  “I love this sweater; I’m not going to give it up!”

“Oh, yes you are!  Look, Nick, if you want me to save it for you, I guess I will, but you are never wearing this thing again!  If you want to be a lawyer, you need to dress like a lawyer. And let me tell you, no self respecting lawyer would be caught dead in something like that, even on his day off.” 

“Well… I guess you’re right.  I should probably start dressing like an adult now, to get in the habit of it.”

“Exactly.  So hand it over.  I promise I won't burn it."

“O-ok…” Phoenix nodded and reluctantly took off the oversized pink sweater for the final time.  It hurt to let it go, but he knew that it probably had to be done.

Maya snatched it away, and then shoved it into her purse.  “Good. Step one to becoming a serious lawyer, complete.” 

“So what’s step two?” 

“Hmm…” she gave him the once over, nodding as she did so.  “I guess step two is probably seeing about getting you a different hairstyle.”

"Not a chance!  I'm willing to change my clothes, but not my hair.  It's a part of who I am."

"So, looking like a hedgehog is part of who you are?" 

"Yes!  No!  I just- I just like my hair gelled back is all.  I think it suits me." 

Maya pursed her lips together.  "Well... All right," she conceded.  "The hair can stay.  But don't blame me if you're the most ridiculous looking lawyer in whatever Ivy League school you end up in."

Phoenix laughed as he got up to get a towel.  "I'll take my chances."

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, so I know the idea for this crossover has been tossed around a lot, and I think I've seen a crossover fic for the musical, but I haven't seen a crossover fic for the movie yet? I could be wrong; there could already be one out there, but this is my take on the idea; it starts off kinda silly, but it gets more serious as it goes on... Anyway, I hope you guys like it :P Thanks for reading!


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